I'm in a terrible jam and looking for suggestions. Please no jokes or snide remarks.?

I recommend staying at a hostile for the time being as it is the cheapest living option in most cases- I know there are hostels in Tampa, Fl, many cities in CA and NY. Once you find a place to stay get a temporary job at a coffee shop or the likes until you build up a solid resume, make connections, and can find more suitable work for your credentials and experience. Get involved in a local church and be honest about your predicament and hopefully they will be the type of Christ followers that help their neighbor. Offer your services ( can you do yard work? landscaping? Walk dogs? Prepare meals for the elderly? Clean houses?) Let them know you aren't asking for money, just work opportunity. You could also look up non-profit organizations that help get people on their feet. I know City on a Hill in Milwaukee, Wi for example works with people to provide them with business clothes and help prepare them for interviews. I'll be praying for the right friends in your life at this time and for God's provision.